Joke Quotes - BrainyQuote

Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke. Will Rogers

People, Seriously, Politicians, Changing

Everybody I know who is funny, it's in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to tell a joke, though I don't like to tell jokes. But I think you have to be born with a sense of humor and a sense of timing. Carol Burnett

Funny, Humor, People, Think, Born, You

If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke? - Steven Wright

If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke? Steven Wright

Forest, You, Nobody, Tell, Laughs

It's important to remember that life is a joke, and that outlook grants a lot of perspective, but I don't think comedy should change and become political due to other things. It should just laugh at that cosmic joke that life is all the time. John Mulaney

Life, Change, Time, Perspective, Think

Pretension is a poor joke that you play on yourself. Snap out of it. Recognise your strengths, work on your weaknesses. Real achievement is liking what you see in the mirror every morning. Virat Kohli

Work, Morning, Mirror, Achievement, You

So many guys are so conservative with their hair, and I always joke with all my buddies when they mess with me, and I'll say, 'That's right, keep the same haircut for ten years.' How fun is that? Tom Brady

Fun, Hair, Me, Haircut, Conservative

The aim of a joke is not to degrade the human being, but to remind him that he is already degraded. George Orwell

Human, Human Being, Aim, Him, Being, He

I need your help. I am injured, near death, and too weak to hike out of here. I am all alone. This is no joke. In the name of God, please remain to save me. I am out collecting berries close by and shall return this evening. Thank you, Chris McCandless. Christopher McCandless

God, Alone, Death, I Am, Me, Name

I'm grateful for every stupid mistake and dumb joke I tried to make. Bo Burnham

Mistake, Grateful, Stupid, Dumb, Tried

I've been keeping a diary for thirty-three years and write in it every morning. Most of it's just whining, but every so often there'll be something I can use later: a joke, a description, a quote. It's an invaluable aid when it comes to winning arguments. 'That's not what you said on February 3, 1996,' I'll say to someone. David Sedaris

Morning, February, Winning, You, I Can

Why would a lazy guy become a parent of five? Then again, why would creative people who inherently don't like change and criticism become writers, actors, or comedians? There's something about this process. I joke about it: My kids have made me a better person, and I only need, like, 34 more of them to be a really good guy. Jim Gaffigan

Change, Good, People, Better, Creative

It's just not funny to disrespect other people's beliefs, backgrounds, cultures, or identities when those are deeply rooted in longstanding oppression. Jokes that punch down on marginalized people require no creativity because they've existed since the beginning of time. It's like telling a knock-knock joke and believing you're Richard Pryor. Franchesca Ramsey

Funny, Creativity, Time, Beginning, You

Being a parent is not for the faint of heart. I may joke about knowing fear, but the fact is, the first time I ever knew real fear was the day Charlotte, my first child, was born. Suddenly there is someone in the world you care about more than anything. Harlan Coben

Heart, Fear, Time, Day, Child, World

The world is indeed comic, but the joke is on mankind. H. P. Lovecraft

World, Mankind, Comic, Indeed

My way of joking is to tell the truth. That's the funniest joke in the world. - Muhammad Ali

My way of joking is to tell the truth. That's the funniest joke in the world. Muhammad Ali

Truth, World, Way, Tell, Joking

The whole westward expansion myth is seen as romantic. But it's a joke, a blot on American history. Frank Waters

History, Romantic, American, Westward

My comedy notebooks are filled with random journal entries. It's all the same. I can look back on old joke notebooks, and know exactly what was going on in my life. Sarah Silverman

Life, Random, My Life, Comedy, I Can

In my deepest parts of sadness, I'm always making a joke or being sarcastic. Lea Thompson

Sadness, Deepest, Always, Sarcastic

I always joke about letting the haters motivate you. Everybody has that in their life, people who doubt them or make them feel less than they are. It just takes faith and belief in yourself, and you've got to dig deep into that. That has to come from you - nobody's going to give you that. Jennifer Lopez

Life, Faith, Yourself, People, Deep, You

The fine line between roaring with laughter and crying because it's a disaster is a very, very fine line. You see a chap slip on a banana skin in the street and you roar with laughter when he falls slap on his backside. If in doing so you suddenly see he's broken a leg, you very quickly stop laughing and it's not a joke anymore. Roald Dahl

Broken, Laughter, Doing, You, Street

I used to have this joke: 'Every hallway is a runway.' Tyra Banks

Runway, Used, Hallway, Every

I've always had to conquer fear when I'm on stage. Basically, I was and still am a very shy person. It's absolutely in conflict with what I do. But once I deliver the first joke I'm okay. It's like I'm out there all by myself just delivering my lines to nobody in particular without ever trying to notice the audience in front of me. Steven Wright

Fear, Myself, Me, Conflict, Conquer, Shy

My preference is for people who can do sketch comedy or situational comedy, where it's not a joke, but it's telling a story. Carol Burnett

People, Story, Comedy, Sketch, Where

Cartooning is about deconstruction: you gotta tear something down to make a joke. Berkeley Breathed

You, Down, Something, Make, Cartooning

I made so many jokes about poor Russell Crowe, he once knocked on my dressing room door, and told me he wanted to go out on this chat show we were on to laugh with me. Now he's ruined it. I can't make another joke about him. Joan Rivers

Me, Door, Laugh, Now, Poor, Go

The humanists' replacement for religion: work really hard and somehow you'll either save yourself or you'll be immortal. Of course, that's a total joke, and our progress is nothing. There may be progress in technology but there's no ethical progress whatsoever. David Bowie

Work, Technology, Yourself, Progress

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