Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.
To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.
Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.
No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar.
There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it.
Laurence J. Peter
I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.
Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
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