Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent.
The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.
Not only do I not know what's going on, I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did.
Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that.
There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.
Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
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