Wilson Mizner Quotes

American - Dramatist May 19, 1876 - April 3, 1933

If you steal from one author it's plagiarism; if you steal from many it's research.

Research You Plagiarism Steal Many

Be nice to people on your way up because you'll meet them on your way down.

People You Brainy Down

To profit from good advice requires more wisdom than to give it.

Good Wisdom Advice Good Advice

Don't talk about yourself; it will be done when you leave.

Funny Yourself You Done Talk

A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while, he knows something.

Good Only Something He

Gambling: The sure way of getting nothing for something.

Funny Way Gambling Nothing

In the battle of existence, Talent is the punch; Tact is the clever footwork.

Talent Battle Clever Existence

There is something about a closet that makes a skeleton terribly restless.

Something Skeleton About Restless

The cuckoo who is on to himself is halfway out of the clock.

Clock Out Who Halfway

I hate careless flattery, the kind that exhausts you in your efforts to believe it.

Hate Believe You Careless

Top 10
Wilson Mizner
Quotes

Do not be desirous of having things done quickly. Do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished.

Great Small Look Looking

The most efficient water power in the world - women's tears.

Women Water Power Tears

It is not in life, but in art that self-fulfillment is to be found.

A drama critic is a person who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant.

Person Drama Who Surprises

You sparkle with larceny.

You Sparkle Larceny

Art is science made clear.

Science Art Clear Made

If you count all your assets you always show a profit.

You Always Your Profit

All anger is not sinful, because some degree of it, and on some occasions, is inevitable. But it becomes sinful and contradicts the rule of Scripture when it is conceived upon slight and inadequate provocation, and when it continues long.

Anger Long Degree Inevitable

Life's a tough proposition, and the first hundred years are the hardest.

Life Tough Hardest Years

Popularity is exhausting. The life of the party almost always winds up in a corner with an overcoat over him.

Life Party Always Up

I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you an education.

Education Faith Respect You

A slave has but one master. An ambition man, has as many as there are people who helped him get his fortune.

Man People Ambition Master

I can usually judge a fellow by what he laughs at.

Judge I Can He Laughs

The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.

Best Friends Way Your Away

A fellow who is always declaring he's no fool usually has his suspicions.

Fool Always Who He

Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up.

Death Welcome Only Up

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