I bruise like a grape.
Mo Rocca

Honestly we never lied to people about who we were. Usually the wackier interviews came to pass because the interview subjects, aware that we were Comedy Central, just wanted to get their stories out.
Mo Rocca

The most important thing is to write material that YOU think is funny. If you don't think it's funny, but you're convinced that other people will think it is, well they won't.
Mo Rocca

When it comes to war, we focus more on the mainstream coverage of the event, rather than the event itself. People dying is never funny. Protest puppets are always funny.
Mo Rocca

If there's one thing that everyone can agree on, it's that, right or wrong, they hate the press.
Mo Rocca

It's one of my favorite things to do, watch TV and stretch. I'm so flexible. I can put my legs behind my head. I want to be the most flexible person in the world.
Mo Rocca

No, no, no separate but equal... never the twain shall meet. And the pendulum kept swinging and it came to rest in the bastard hybrid known as the Daily Show.
Mo Rocca

I can't be everything to everyone. Send me your specs.
Mo Rocca