To live is so startling it leaves little time for anything else.
Emily Dickinson

Only the guy who isn't rowing has time to rock the boat.
Jean-Paul Sartre

The time to take counsel of your fears is before you make an important battle decision. That's the time to listen to every fear you can imagine! When you have collected all the facts and fears and made your decision, turn off all your fears and go ahead!
George S. Patton

Do your damnedest in an ostentatious manner all the time.
George S. Patton

There is a time to take counsel of your fears, and there is a time to never listen to any fear.
George S. Patton

Y'know, you can't please all the people all the time... and last night, all those people were at my show.
Mitch Hedberg

Every time I go and shave, I assume there's someone else on the planet shaving. So I say, 'I'm gonna go shave, too.'
Mitch Hedberg

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.
Steven Wright

Do the one thing you think you cannot do. Fail at it. Try again. Do better the second time. The only people who never tumble are those who never mount the high wire. This is your moment. Own it.
Oprah Winfrey

The greatest discovery of all time is that a person can change his future by merely changing his attitude.
Oprah Winfrey

I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt.
Groucho Marx

I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
Steven Wright

Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time.
Steven Wright

I saw a bank that said "24 Hour Banking," but I don't have that much time.
Steven Wright

The time to hesitate is through.
Jim Morrison

I bought some instant water one time but I didn't know what to add to it.
Steven Wright

It takes a long time to become young.
Pablo Picasso

Never permit a dichotomy to rule your life, a dichotomy in which you hate what you do so you can have pleasure in your spare time. Look for a situation in which your work will give you as much happiness as your spare time.
Pablo Picasso

One always has time enough, if one will apply it well.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Many people take no care of their money till they come nearly to the end of it, and others do just the same with their time.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe