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I swear by that old expression, 'One monkey don't stop no show!' The reality is, we still have some good men out there, and we should hail those men as the kings they are.
There were times, especially when I was traveling for 'Eat, Pray, Love,' when, I swear to God, I would feel this weight of my female ancestors, all those Swedish farmwives from beyond the grave who were like, 'Go! Go to Naples! Eat more pizza! Go to India, ride an elephant! Do it! Swim in the Indian Ocean. Read those books. Learn a language.'
I think happiness is a choice. If you feel yourself being happy and can settle in to the life choices you make, then it's great. It's really, really great. I swear to God, happiness is the best makeup.
A lot of people don't realize that depression is an illness. I don't wish it on anyone, but if they would know how it feels, I swear they would think twice before they just shrug it.
I like Pixie Sticks. Yeah, screw the middle man. Just a tube of sugar... I'd pour two of those in a big 12 ounce coke. And I'd go out to catechism class and try to concentrate on the priest. I saw Jesus several times. I swear I did.
I swear, by my life and my love of it, that I will never live for the sake of another man, nor ask another man to live for mine.
I swear to the Lord, I still can't see, why Democracy means, everybody but me.
Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.
W. C. Fields
My first dunk ever was in middle school. We were playing, me and my church friends, and I dunked it, and I swear I could not sleep that night.
I really did put up all my wedding pictures on my website. And I swear to you, my wedding pictures got downloaded just as much as my bikini pictures.
I swear to God, if you saw me when I am by myself in the woods, I'm a lunatic. I sing, I dance.
When angry, count to four; when very angry, swear.
I do walk with a bit of a swagger. I do swear a lot. And people are going to be offended by that. But in this PC world, you can't be honest.
The kids started teasing me to get me to swear in Italian. Two or three months, I started retaliating. I found out I could whip these guys. So I'm always fighting, getting even. Even the girls in school, when they gave me trouble, I'd take a glove of garlic, chew it, and blow my breath at them. So my whole life became a life of getting even.
Must swear off from swearing. Bad habit.
Rutherford B. Hayes
It was illegal for black people and white people to play checkers together in Birmingham. And there were even black and white Bibles to swear to tell the truth on in many parts of the South.
People ask 'do you make a conscious effort not to swear?' - if you're doing silly stuff you're not tempted to put swearing in. All the comics from my childhood, who were funny without swearing, were the people that influenced me. What I do is quite traditional anyway.
There is the good and the bad, the great and the low, the just and the unjust. I swear to you that all that will never change.
You should not take a fellow eight years old and make him swear to never kiss the girls.
Liars are always most disposed to swear.
My two secrets to staying healthy: wash your hands all the time. And, if you can't, use Purell or one of the sanitizers. And the other is hot peppers. I eat a lot of hot peppers. I for some reason started doing that in 1992, and I swear by it.
Utility is the great idol of the age, to which all powers must do service and all talents swear allegiance.
I never yet feared those men who set a place apart in the middle of their cities where they gather to cheat one another and swear oaths which they break.
All presidents swear an oath to the Constitution to keep this country united, and when the country fell apart, Lincoln had to put it back together again, with a lot of help. But he bore total responsibility.
I have a very dark sense of humor. I swear. I have a very playful relationship with Jesus.
A. P. J. Abdul Kalam
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