Whenever I get married, I start buying Gourmet magazine.
Nora Ephron

Never get married in college; it's hard to get a start if a prospective employer finds you've already made one mistake.
Elbert Hubbard

Well, my wife and I were married in a toilet - it was a marriage of convenience!
Tommy Cooper

Millions of people are married. I've never picked up a paper and seen a headline that says, Man Gets Married!
Larry David

I don't mind being a grandfather; I've been a mother for so many years. You just can't believe what it's like being a father. Especially when you come out of the chaos of the road to getting married and having children.
Steven Tyler

If you made a list of reasons why any couple got married, and another list of the reasons for their divorce, you'd have a hell of a lot of overlapping.
Mignon McLaughlin

Mom and Pop were just a couple of kids when they got married. He was eighteen, she was sixteen and I was three.
Billie Holiday

People of art should never get married and have children, because it's a selfish experience.
Mikhail Baryshnikov

I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.
Sam Kinison

Creativity is not merely the innocent spontaneity of our youth and childhood; it must also be married to the passion of the adult human being, which is a passion to live beyond one's death.
Rollo May

I just want to go to university and have fun - I want to be an ordinary student. I'm only going to university. It's not like I'm getting married - though that's what it feels like sometimes.
Prince William

I married an archaeologist because the older I grow, the more he appreciates me.
Agatha Christie

You can't be a Red if you're married to a civil servant.
Doris Lessing

Once I got married and had kids, I moved away from romantic roles, because it seemed wrong to have my 3-year-old wondering why Daddy was kissing someone else.
Chevy Chase

When I get married it will be for keeps.
Natalie Wood

Sometimes when I visit my sister and her two children, I wonder if she missed a lot by getting married. Right now, nothing could be further from my mind than getting married.
Natalie Wood

I'm 36 and if I met a woman of my own age and married her, I'd also be marrying her former life, her past. It might be OK for some people - I don't want to judge it or anything - but it's not for me. It would destroy my creativity.
Henry Rollins

I just get things done instead of talking about getting them done. I don't go out and party. I don't smoke, drink or do drugs and I'm not married, that leaves a lot of time for my work.
Henry Rollins

Well, I just said that Jesus and I were both Jewish and that neither of us ever had a job, we never had a home, we never married and we traveled around the countryside irritating people.
Kinky Friedman

When we won the league championship, all the married guys on the club had to thank their wives for putting up with all the stress and strain all season. I had to thank all the single broads in New York.
Joe Namath