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Over the last 15 months, we've traveled to every corner of the United States. I've now been in 57 states? I think one left to go. Alaska and Hawaii, I was not allowed to go to even though I really wanted to visit, but my staff would not justify it.
Barack Obama

My task over the last two years hasn't just been to stop the bleeding. My task has also been to try to figure out how do we address some of the structural problems in the economy that have prevented more Googles from being created.
Barack Obama

The last thing you want to do is raise taxes in the middle of the recession because that would just suck up and take more demand out of the economy and put businesses in a further hole.
Barack Obama

The school is the last expenditure upon which America should be willing to economize.
Franklin D. Roosevelt

People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing - that's why we recommend it daily.
Zig Ziglar

I recently took up ice sculpting. Last night I made an ice cube. This morning I made 12, I was prolific.
Mitch Hedberg

Tough times don't last, tough people do, remember?
Gregory Peck

I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it.
Rodney Dangerfield

My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by a quaker.
Woody Allen

Do every act of your life as if it were your last.
Marcus Aurelius


Be content with what you are, and wish not change; nor dread your last day, nor long for it.
Marcus Aurelius

And thou wilt give thyself relief, if thou doest every act of thy life as if it were the last.
Marcus Aurelius

Execute every act of thy life as though it were thy last.
Marcus Aurelius

I start where the last man left off.
Thomas A. Edison

Tough times never last, but tough people do.
Robert H. Schuller

Y'know, you can't please all the people all the time... and last night, all those people were at my show.
Mitch Hedberg

I'm gonna fix that last joke by taking out all the words and adding new ones.
Mitch Hedberg

Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.
Steven Wright

I stayed in a really old hotel last night. They sent me a wake-up letter.
Steven Wright

Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish.
Steven Wright

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