There are a hell of a lot of jobs that are scarier than live comedy. Like standing in the operating room when a guy's heart stops, and you're the one who has to fix it!
Jon Stewart

Believe in love. Believe in magic. Hell, believe in Santa Clause. Believe in others. Believe in yourself. Believe in your dreams. If you don't, who will?
Jon Bon Jovi

The Senate is a place filled with goodwill and good intentions, and if the road to hell is paved with them, then it's a pretty good detour.
Hubert H. Humphrey

There's nothing wrong with being gay. I have plenty of friends who are going to hell.
Stephen Colbert

The hell to be endured hereafter, of which theology tells, is no worse than the hell we make for ourselves in this world by habitually fashioned our characters in the wrong way.
William James

You may all go to Hell, and I will go to Texas.
Davy Crockett

I had to get rid of any idea of hell or any idea of the afterlife. That's what held me, kept me down. So now I just have nothing but contempt for the institution of the church.
Frank McCourt

One cannot walk through an assembly factory and not feel that one is in Hell.
W. H. Auden

Let's drink to the spirit of gallantry and courage that made a strange Heaven out of unbelievable Hell, and let's drink to the hope that one day this country of ours, which we love so much, will find dignity and greatness and peace again.
Noel Coward

If I were overweight because I ate too much, I would have far more of a complex. I would know if I just stopped eating and showed a little discipline I would be thin. But there's not a hell of a lot I can do about being short. You just gotta run with it.
Michael J. Fox

I am trying to think of the last time that I just said, 'What the hell!' and did something crazy.
Jennifer Aniston

If somebody ever wished to be me for a day, they'd be the most pissed-off person once they got here. They would be, like, in hell.
Jennifer Aniston

Hell hath no fury like a liberal scorned.
Dick Gregory

Let me go to hell, that's all I ask, and go on cursing them there, and them look down and hear me, that might take some of the shine off their bliss.
Samuel Beckett

Hateful to me as are the gates of hell, Is he who, hiding one thing in his heart, Utters another.
Homer

To hell with facts! We need stories!
Ken Kesey

Good music is good music, and everything else can go to hell.
Dave Matthews

Christianity supplies a Hell for the people who disagree with you and a Heaven for your friends.
Elbert Hubbard

If you made a list of reasons why any couple got married, and another list of the reasons for their divorce, you'd have a hell of a lot of overlapping.
Mignon McLaughlin

It's odd that you can get so anesthetized by your own pain or your own problem that you don't quite fully share the hell of someone close to you.
Lady Bird Johnson