Fat Quotes

The devil has put a penalty on all things we enjoy in life. Either we suffer in health or we suffer in soul or we get fat.
Albert Einstein

Life, Health, Enjoy

I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.
Rodney Dangerfield

Found, Thin, Hang

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
Erma Bombeck

I've never been able to understand why a Republican contributor is a 'fat cat' and a Democratic contributor of the same amount of money is a 'public-spirited philanthropist'.
Ronald Reagan

Money, Understand, Why

I guess I don't so much mind being old, as I mind being fat and old.
Benjamin Franklin

Mind, Old, Guess

A conservative is a man who is too cowardly to fight and too fat to run.
Elbert Hubbard

Fight, Run, Cowardly

If you are young and you drink a great deal it will spoil your health, slow your mind, make you fat - in other words, turn you into an adult.
P. J. O'Rourke

Health, Great, Mind

Folk music is a bunch of fat people.
Bob Dylan

Music, Folk, Bunch

It's simple, if it jiggles, it's fat.
Arnold Schwarzenegger

With my sunglasses on, I'm Jack Nicholson. Without them, I'm fat and 60.
Jack Nicholson

Sunglasses, Jack, Nicholson

I'm fat, but I'm thin inside... there's a thin man inside every fat man.
George Orwell

There were years when I was a beer and tequila guy, then I got real fat. And then I found that you could actually go on a diet and drink scotch. Then I got hooked on scotch, and if you get hooked on scotch, then everything else just tastes wrong.
Ron White

Diet, Real, Wrong

If you can't tell a spoon from a ladle, then you're fat!
Demetri Martin

There is no need to worry about mere size. We do not necessarily respect a fat man more than a thin man. Sir Isaac Newton was very much smaller than a hippopotamus, but we do not on that account value him less.
Bertrand Russell

Respect, Him, Worry

None of us wanted to be the bass player. In our minds he was the fat guy who always played at the back.
Paul McCartney

Wanted, Minds, Guy

A recent police study found that you're much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run.
Dennis Miller

Study, Found, Run

I find no sweeter fat than sticks to my own bones.
Walt Whitman

Find, Bones, Sticks

I don't think it's a good advert for any restaurant, a fat chef, and secondly, who wants to eat a dessert when the chef's a fat pig.
Gordon Ramsay

Good, Chef, Wants

A broken heart is what makes life so wonderful five years later, when you see the guy in an elevator and he is fat and smoking a cigar and saying long-time-no-see.
Phyllis Battelle

Life, Heart, Saying

A fat stomach never breeds fine thoughts.
St. Jerome

Thoughts, Fine, Stomach

A lean compromise is better than a fat lawsuit.
George Herbert

Compromise, Lawsuit, Lean

'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'.
Dave Barry

Bag, French, Crawling

When you have a fat friend there are no see-saws, only catapults.
Demetri Martin

For the first time ever, overweight people outnumber average people in America. Doesn't that make overweight the average then? Last month you were fat, now you're average - hey, let's get a pizza!
Jay Leno

Time, America, Last

Pasta doesn't make you fat. How much pasta you eat makes you fat.
Giada De Laurentiis

Makes, Eat, Pasta

Statistically, if you have ever dieted you are extremely likely not only to regain any weight you lose, but to go on to gain even more. Dieting makes you fat.
Arabella Weir

Lose, Makes, Likely

In the 1960s, you could eat anything you wanted, and of course, people were smoking cigarettes and all kinds of things, and there was no talk about fat and anything like that, and butter and cream were rife. Those were lovely days for gastronomy, I must say.
Julia Child

Talk, Wanted, Smoking

I still consider myself a little, fat kid from Hawaii.
Robert Kiyosaki

Kid, Consider, Hawaii

Who ever hears of fat men heading a riot, or herding together in turbulent mobs? No - no, your lean, hungry men who are continually worrying society, and setting the whole community by the ears.
Washington Irving

Men, Society, Together

I developed a nutty attitude where I'd think, If some guy really loves me he doesn't care if I'm fat. I'd come up with all these stupid reasons why it would be OK to be fat.
Kirstie Alley

Attitude, Stupid, Care

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