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When I was younger, I was insecure for about 10 years: I wore glasses, had a cow's lick, buck teeth and braces. I looked ridiculous.
On the farm, I had chores. I had a calf. We had a herd of cattle in the pasture. We'd go and get me a calf at a cow auction with Amish people, which I would raise. I gave it a bottle every day, in this cute little coop, like a giant dog coop almost. I've always been a big animal person.
If I don't work, I'll be sitting on the couch watching TV, eating popcorn and getting like a cow.
I think it's great training for any comedian to start on cows. Because with cows, you expect them to be bored and just stare at you blankly. And that's exactly what you'll get at a comedy club. If you can toughen up with a cow audience, then you'll never be worried with a human audience.
The United States is not just an old cow that gives more milk the more it's kicked in the flanks.
It's a pragmatist's business, comedy. Start off with good intentions and references to the Pompidou Centre and you end up with boiled sweets and a pantomime cow.
If you've ever noticed, beauty pageants are a lot like county fairs. The farmers show the cows the same way. They walk their prized Jersey cow across a stage in front of an audience with judges, and maybe the cow even twirls around a couple of times. Then the winning cow gets a satin ribbon draped over it, which has the title and the year on it.
I'm not here to say I don't eat vegetables - I do, a lot of them - but, from a soil perspective, they're actually more costly than a cow grazing on grass.
Unfortunately, the greatest photographers don't pay extreme attention to the clothes. If they decide to put a dress in a bathtub or in front of a cow in the countryside with dirt everywhere, well, the dresses come back... ready to be put in the garbage.
When I was little, we lived on 8 acres and my mom had a horse. But when I was 7, my mom kicked my dad out, and then in order to feed us five kids, she got critters cheap or for free and raised them for food. We milked a cow, raised chickens, pigs and beef cattle. We heated our one-story house with wood and stayed cold all winter.
Bonnie Jo Campbell
The mere brute pleasure of reading the sort of pleasure a cow must have in grazing.
Gilbert K. Chesterton
A publisher who writes is like a cow in a milk bar.
Don't have a cow, man.
I want to figure out a way to not be stupid with money, then make a whole bunch of it, then I want to move to Outer Mongolia. I want to milk a yak. Maybe I'll just settle for a cow.
USDA says pink slime, which is made of cow connective tissue and other scraps and then treated with ammonia to kill the salmonella, e Coli, potentially, the U.S. Government says it's totally safe.
Then a neighbor, Mr Smith, had a dairy cow and an couple bulls. He showed me how to bluff a bull.
Consumers of meat, eggs and dairy products might well ask what they are supporting. Do farmers care about anyone but themselves? Can't anyone see the cow for the cheese?
I really do love being outdoors - I mean, you'd never think it in my high heels and pencil skirt! But I really do miss the smell of hay and farms, and I like milking a cow.
Fortified plant-based milks are delicious and contain all the calcium, protein, and vitamin D of dairy products but with none of the cholesterol, lactose, hormones, or cruelty found in cow's milk.
The cow, basically, eats three basic things in their feed: corn, beets, and barley, and so what I do is I actually challenge my staff with these crazy, wild ideas. Can we take what the cow eats, remove the cow, and then make some hamburgers out of that?
How do we get a pantomime cow on set. Jeez, the rigours of satire.
Skinny Cow ice cream and candy - like dancing - brings a little bit of fun to your day.
Everyone now has a sacred cow in the tax code. For my money, the most sacred thing of all is our country and its growth, but the sacred cows have turned into a pack of wolves.
We have tried to make it clear that the United States is not just an old cow that gives more milk the more it is kicked in the flanks.
A. P. J. Abdul Kalam
Martin Luther King, Jr.
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