The average American worker has fifty interruptions a day, of which seventy percent have nothing to do with work.
W. Edwards Deming

The average American's day planner has fewer holes in it than Ray Charles's dart board.
Dennis Miller

The average bright young man who is drafted hates the whole business because an army always tries to eliminate the individual differences in men.
Andy Rooney

The average comedian is kind of an observer looking at everyday things that everyone could relate to and then trying to find the exaggeration in those things.
Aries Spears

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
Andy Rooney

The average Englishman has no idea of the dynamism in the music scene here.
Kabir Bedi

The average estimate themselves by what they do, the above average by what they are.
Charles Edwards

The average European does not seem to feel free until he succeeds in enslaving and oppressing others.
Bernard Berenson

The average gardener probably knows little about what is going on in his or her garden.
Ken Thompson

The average Hollywood film star's ambition is to be admired by an American, courted by an Italian, married to an Englishman and have a French boyfriend.
Katharine Hepburn

The average housewife goes to the restaurant to relax and enjoy the food. But when Eva walks in, she becomes the center of attention.
Eva Gabor

The average husband enjoys the total effect of his home but is usually unable to contribute any of the details of work and organisation that make it enjoyable.
Havelock Ellis

The average is that which no person quite ever is.
Robert Anton Wilson

The average life spans of many bands are not that long, up to five years if they are lucky.
Mike McCready

The average man does not know what to do with this life, yet wants another one which will last forever.
Anatole France

The average man has a carefully cultivated ignorance about household matters - from what to do with the crumbs to the grocer's telephone number - a sort of cheerful inefficiency which protects him.
Crystal Eastman

The average man is a conformist, accepting miseries and disasters with the stoicism of a cow standing in the rain.
Colin Wilson

The average man is more interested in a woman who is interested in him than he is in a woman with beautiful legs.
Marlene Dietrich

The average man is not hard to mystify.
Howard Thurston

The average man, if he meddles with criticism at all, is a conservative critic.
A. E. Housman