A half truth, like half a brick, is always more forcible as an argument than a whole one. It carries better.
Stephen Leacock

A sportsman is a man who every now and then, simply has to get out and kill something.
Stephen Leacock

Advertising: the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it.
Stephen Leacock

Astronomy teaches the correct use of the sun and the planets.
Stephen Leacock

Each section of the British Isles has its own way of laughing, except Wales, which doesn't.
Stephen Leacock

Electricity is of two kinds, positive and negative. The difference is, I presume, that one comes a little more expensive, but is more durable; the other is a cheaper thing, but the moths get into it.
Stephen Leacock

Golf may be played on Sunday, not being a game within the view of the law, but being a form of moral effort.
Stephen Leacock

He flung himself from the room, flung himself upon his horse and rode madly off in all directions.
Stephen Leacock

I am a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it.
Stephen Leacock

I detest life-insurance agents: they always argue that I shall some day die, which is not so.
Stephen Leacock


If every day in the life of a school could be the last day but one, there would be little fault to find with it.
Stephen Leacock

In ancient times they had no statistics so they had to fall back on lies.
Stephen Leacock

It is to be observed that 'angling' is the name given to fishing by people who can't fish.
Stephen Leacock

It may be those who do most, dream most.
Stephen Leacock

It takes a good deal of physical courage to ride a horse. This, however, I have. I get it at about forty cents a flask, and take it as required.
Stephen Leacock

It's a lie, but Heaven will forgive you for it.
Stephen Leacock

It's called political economy because it is has nothing to do with either politics or economy.
Stephen Leacock

Life, we learn too late, is in the living, the tissue of every day and hour.
Stephen Leacock

Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.
Stephen Leacock

Men are able to trust one another, knowing the exact degree of dishonesty they are entitled to expect.
Stephen Leacock