Being a mother is hard and it wasn't a subject I ever studied.
Ruby Wax

College atheletes used to get a degree in bringing your pencil.
Ruby Wax

I am lucky to have good Polish skin that doesn't wrinkle so I might be around for a few years yet.
Ruby Wax

I can't do anything too serious like Saddam Hussein, but I would like to do Bill Clinton. That'd be fun.
Ruby Wax

I don't combine proteins and carbohydrates.
Ruby Wax

I have to keep reminding myself that I am their mother. Sometimes we are sitting at home and I feel like we are waiting for our mom to come home.
Ruby Wax

I knew nothing about football, then someone showed me a film of Petit and I realised how interesting the game could be. He is divine. When I met him I could barely speak, he was so gorgeous. Women will love that show.
Ruby Wax

I never weigh myself, but the brutal truth of television is that they don't employ old people or fat people.
Ruby Wax

I'm a misplaced American, but don't know where I was misplaced.
Ruby Wax

I'm lucky not to have a nine-to-five job.
Ruby Wax

I've told so many lies about my age I don't know how old I am myself.
Ruby Wax

Like any working mother I find it hard to have a social life. But my kids are so well adjusted. There isn't a brat bone in their body so I haven't done anything that bad.
Ruby Wax

Mum used to hide love letters from my boyfriends and put me down. Now I understand that she was a Polish immigrant forced to settle in Chicago. She was jealous of the freedom life gave me.
Ruby Wax

Nannies love working in our house because they never know who's gonna walk through the door.
Ruby Wax

Some interviewees you make friends with and some you don't.
Ruby Wax

You have to be great friends and make each other laugh. We laugh a lot and neither is jealous of the other.
Ruby Wax