Mark Twain Quotes

Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.
Mark Twain

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.
Mark Twain

Life, Nothing, Saying

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
Mark Twain

Funny, Hell, Heaven

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Apparently there is nothing that cannot happen today.
Mark Twain

Today, Nothing, Happen

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
Mark Twain

Age, Mind, Matter

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
Mark Twain

Funny, Facts, Please

Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.
Mark Twain

Anger, Harm, Acid

Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.
Mark Twain

Politics, Idiot, Congress

Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it.
Mark Twain

Memorial Day, Time, Government

It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt.
Mark Twain

Fool, Doubt, Thought

Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.
Mark Twain

Forgiveness, Fragrance, Crushed

Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.
Mark Twain

Business, Time, Yourself

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
Mark Twain

Truth, Remember, Tell

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
Mark Twain

Kindness, Language, Hear

Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
Mark Twain

Life, Good, Friends

A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.
Mark Twain

Experience, Learn, Cat

The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.
Mark Twain

Death, Life, Time

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
Mark Twain

Giving, Done, Smoking

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.
Mark Twain

Courage, Fear, Absence

In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.
Mark Twain

Education, God, School

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
Mark Twain

Health, May, Die

A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read.
Mark Twain

Person, Read, Won

It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.
Mark Twain

Fool, Doubt, Keep

A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.
Mark Twain

Liar, Himself, Truthful

Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.
Mark Twain

Truth, Stranger, Fiction

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Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Author

Born: November 30, 1835

Died: April 21, 1910

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