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Lewis Black Quotes
- Page 5
If we're not going to tax the rich anymore, we're going to create class warfare.
It's a privilege to pay taxes. Yeah! It's not a political question, folks. We have to pay for stuff.
Most of the longer-term relationships I've known have been gay relationships. They seem to be able to hang out longer.
Nobody in college races home and says, 'I can't wait to see the news! I can't wait to see who CBS is going to hire!'
Parenting isn't just parenting your own child.
Political audiences are not fun.
The whole Valentine's thing is fine, but you don't back it up right next to the biggest gift-giving holiday of the year. Unbelievable. And we find it acceptable.
I do the same gig. I might change it a little; I might slow it down if I'm in the South. I talk fast, and they're not used to people talking that fast.
I don't buy the 'at 60 it's great to have kids' thing. I don't buy the line that has been thrown down - 'You can have a kid at any time.' That doesn't mean you should.
I don't Tweet a lot because I've Tweeted things that I thought were really innocuous about subjects that are inflammatory, and the response is so insane sometimes from people.
I started playing golf when I was a kid, because across the street from where we lived there was a little nine-hole golf course where my father worked.
I've got stress like anybody else, and it builds up during the day. Like, I'll be trying to do something on the computer, and I'll get stuck ,so I go to the help section. And it just enrages me, because why even call it a help section at all? There's nothing in any way 'helpful' about it.
What I've found in my career is that 70 to 75 percent of comics are nice and have some sense of social skills, but there are those who end up in comedy because they don't know how to socialize. I don't want to deal with that group.
My father worked at the Naval Ordnance Lab, and they had a nine-hole course on the property. You paid a quarter.
I'm a Jew.
Self-love is a big part of golf.
When I'm funny is when I'm angriest.
Macs are not intuitive. It's intuitive to the person who created it. It's not intuitive to me.
The core of the American public, their hearts and their minds are in the right place. And that gives me hope.
I continue to work on plays, but I've always felt that you could put a note in a bottle and send it offshore, and you'd have as much chance communicating with people.
I get an idea about something. I just start thinking about it, and then I get onstage and I talk about it, and then I think about it some more and talk about it some more, and think about it some more and talk about it some more, until it starts to take a shape.
I think comics in New York are interested in being comics. And there're comics in L.A. who are touring comics, who are certainly more interested in stand-up, but a lot of L.A. stand-ups are really looking to do something else.
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W. C. Fields
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