Lenny Bruce Quotes

If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago, Catholic school children would be wearing little electric chairs around their necks instead of crosses.
Lenny Bruce

School, Children, Jesus

There are never enough I Love You's.
Lenny Bruce

Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God.
Lenny Bruce

God, Away, Church

The 'what should be' never did exist, but people keep trying to live up to it. There is no 'what should be,' there is only what is.
Lenny Bruce

Live, Trying, Keep

The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it... try to fake three laughs in an hour - ha ha ha ha ha - they'll take you away, man. You can't.
Lenny Bruce

Art, Laughter, Fake

Communism is like one big phone company.
Lenny Bruce

Funny, Big, Company

The liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them.
Lenny Bruce

Everything, Understand, Liberals

In the Halls of Justice the only justice is in the halls.
Lenny Bruce

I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We used to write essays like: What I'm going to be if I grow up.
Lenny Bruce

School, Tough, Write

When you're eight years old nothing is your business.
Lenny Bruce

Business, Nothing, Old

Miami Beach is where neon goes to die.
Lenny Bruce

Funny, Die, Goes

Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to satirize it. Which is rather ridiculous, when you think about it.
Lenny Bruce

Time, Give, Enough

I hate small towns because once you've seen the cannon in the park there's nothing else to do.
Lenny Bruce

Hate, Nothing, Small

The only truly anonymous donor is the guy who knocks up your daughter.
Lenny Bruce

Guy, Truly, Daughter

A lot of people say to me, 'Why did you kill Christ?' I dunno, it was one of those parties, got out of hand, you know.
Lenny Bruce

Why, Hand, Christ

If you can take the hot lead enema, then you can cast the first stone.
Lenny Bruce

Hot, Lead, Stone

The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh, at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds.
Lenny Bruce

Laugh, Once, Audience

I'll die young, but it's like kissing God.
Lenny Bruce

God, Die, Young

Share with your Friends

Everyone likes a good quote - don't forget to share.

Biography

Nationality: American

Born: October 13, 1925

Died: August 3, 1966

Links

Quotes about Lenny Bruce

Find on Amazon: Lenny Bruce

Cite this Page: Citation

Popular Topics

Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

Related Authors

George Carlin
Bill Cosby
Groucho Marx
Mitch Hedberg
Steven Wright
Lucille Ball
W. C. Fields
Rodney Dangerfield
More

Get Social with BrainyQuote

BrainyQuote Desktop

BrainyQuote Mobile

Site

Quote of the Day

Social

BQ on Pinterest

Syndication

Funny Quote Feed

Love Quote Feed

Nature Quote Feed

About Us