I never knew a man come to greatness or eminence who lay abed late in the morning.
Jonathan Swift

I never saw, heard, nor read, that the clergy were beloved in any nation where Christianity was the religion of the country. Nothing can render them popular, but some degree of persecution.
Jonathan Swift

I never wonder to see men wicked, but I often wonder to see them not ashamed.
Jonathan Swift

I wonder what fool it was that first invented kissing.
Jonathan Swift

I've always believed no matter how many shots I miss, I'm going to make the next one.
Jonathan Swift

If Heaven had looked upon riches to be a valuable thing, it would not have given them to such a scoundrel.
Jonathan Swift

Interest is the spur of the people, but glory that of great souls. Invention is the talent of youth, and judgment of age.
Jonathan Swift

Invention is the talent of youth, as judgment is of age.
Jonathan Swift

It is a maxim among these lawyers, that whatever hath been done before, may legally be done again: and therefore they take special care to record all the decisions formerly made against common justice and the general reason of mankind.
Jonathan Swift

It is impossible that anything so natural, so necessary, and so universal as death, should ever have been designed by providence as an evil to mankind.
Jonathan Swift

It is in men as in soils where sometimes there is a vein of gold which the owner knows not.
Jonathan Swift

It is the folly of too many to mistake the echo of a London coffee-house for the voice of the kingdom.
Jonathan Swift

Laws are like cobwebs, which may catch small flies, but let wasps and hornets break through.
Jonathan Swift

May you live all the days of your life.
Jonathan Swift

May you live every day of your life.
Jonathan Swift

Men are happy to be laughed at for their humor, but not for their folly.
Jonathan Swift

Most sorts of diversion in men, children and other animals, are in imitation of fighting.
Jonathan Swift

My nose itched, and I knew I should drink wine or kiss a fool.
Jonathan Swift

No man was ever so completely skilled in the conduct of life, as not to receive new information from age and experience.
Jonathan Swift

No wise man ever wished to be younger.
Jonathan Swift