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Jimmy Fallon Quotes
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Researches tested a new form of medical marijuana that treats pain but doesn't get the user high, prompting patients who need medical marijuana to declare, 'Thank you?'
If you're a sports fan you realize that when you meet somebody, like a girlfriend, they kind of have to root for your team. They don't have a choice.
When I see professional clowns, mimes, or people who makes ballon animals, I think of their relatives and how disappointed they must be.
I became a Yankees fan for a few years. But now, I gotta say, I'm really rooting for the Red Sox.
I like video games, I like tech, I like being positive.
You only think of the best comeback when you leave.
I don't shoot guns. I don't know how to do that. I grew Upstate New York, so I fought with my fists.
Listening is more important than talking. Just hit your mark and believe what you say. Just listen to people and react to what they are saying.
Anything I learned was just work hard, just keep working and don't worry about the outside stuff. Whatever happens will happen.
I like to see people laugh who are normally serious.
I never sing in the shower. It's very dangerous.
Thank you... Apple, for adding a camera to the iPod Nano. Now it's just like the iPhone except it can't make calls. So basically, it's just like the iPhone.
I didn't act like I was there. I just got into the story.
I just really don't like being the center of attention that much. It's kind of ironic.
I don't even read the papers. I read 'USA Today' because it has color photos.
I grew up in an Irish Catholic family, and I think they force you to watch every James Cagney movie.
I like being absurd. Being silly.
Thank you, yard sales, for being the perfect way to say to your neighbors: 'We think we're important enough to charge money for our garbage.'
I'm on so late I'm definitely the last seconds of anyone's attention. So I just want to give them something dumb to laugh at, so they go, 'That's funny,' then fall asleep.
Thank you... 'Real Housewives of Atlanta,' for demonstrating a universal truth: Idiots like me will always watch idiots like you fight on TV. You will forever be in my TiVo.
We picked the Red Sox because they lose. If you root for something that loses for 86 years, you're a pretty good fan. You don't have to win everything to be a fan of something.
I had a gun and I had to run and shoot, which is not easy.
I honestly, purposely have not gone to therapy because I know some crazy stuff's going to be dragged up and, you know, I'll be like, 'Wait, what?'
It's all about the script. Reality is key to me and less cutesy.
They got a great performance from me. I was happy.
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