Jay Mohr Quotes

When human beings stop progressing at an endeavor, they stop enjoying it and move on to something else. Not golfers. Masochists, all of them.
Jay Mohr

Human, Else, Stop

You know how to tell if the teacher is hung over? Movie Day.
Jay Mohr

Teacher, Tell, Movie

But if applause throws off your timing, then you're not the kind of comedian I would like to see. All you have to do is stand there and take it.
Jay Mohr

Off, Stand, Timing

Fantasy football is not only a good thing, but a great thing.
Jay Mohr

Good, Great, Football

I hate golf. I do not understand how anyone can enjoy it, much less love it.
Jay Mohr

Love, Hate, Enjoy

I never minded George Steinbrenner spending obscene amounts of money to put the best product on the field.
Jay Mohr

Money, Best, Put

I think I made a mistake once... yeah... it was only once.
Jay Mohr

Once, Mistake, Yeah

I was the youngest kid on my street, the youngest comic in the clubs. I always felt like I was playing catch-up. I was very angry.
Jay Mohr

Angry, Playing, Felt

I wasn't the guy everyone liked. I was the guy that wouldn't shut up.
Jay Mohr

Everyone, Guy, Liked

I'm oddly not competitive. What I love about show business is there is a home for everyone.
Jay Mohr

Love, Home, Business

If it doesn't know what to charge you for nosebleed seats, your team sucks.
Jay Mohr

Team, Charge, Sucks

If it has to sell its mascot, your team sucks.
Jay Mohr

Team, Sell, Sucks

Not everyone likes sports. Gandhi and Malcolm X come to mind.
Jay Mohr

Sports, Mind, Everyone

True Yankees are born, not made.
Jay Mohr

True, Born, Yankees

Unfortunately, there are no mulligans when it comes to pro football contracts.
Jay Mohr

Football, Pro, Contracts

Why are baseball managers the only coaches who dress up like the players?
Jay Mohr

Baseball, Why, Players

I think golf is a waste of time and a waste of a sunny afternoon. I also stink at it. I have never found anything, including divorce and a sexual harassment suit, more frustrating.
Jay Mohr

Time, Divorce, Found

I wonder why there is a designated hitter in baseball after all these years? As an experiment, it seemed like a swell enough idea, but you would think the novelty would have worn off by now and everyone would get back to playing baseball.
Jay Mohr

Baseball, Enough, Why

Marc Maron's podcast success has nothing to do with my podcast success. If I do a quarter of a million downloads, I can show that to an advertiser as a fact, and that's that.
Jay Mohr

Success, Nothing, Fact

Share with your Friends

Everyone likes a good quote - don't forget to share.

Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Actor

Born: August 23, 1970

Links

Find on Amazon: Jay Mohr

Cite this Page: Citation

Popular Topics

Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

Related Authors

Bruce Lee
Charlie Sheen
Will Smith
Will Rogers
John Wayne
Johnny Depp
Clint Eastwood
Carroll O'Connor
More

Get Social with BrainyQuote

BrainyQuote Desktop

BrainyQuote Mobile

Site

Quote of the Day

Social

BQ on Pinterest

Syndication

Funny Quote Feed

Love Quote Feed

Nature Quote Feed

About Us