I know it's not cat food, but what exactly is it that they put inside of tinned ravioli?
Doug Coupland

I like doing radio because it's so intimate. The moment people hear your voice, you're inside there heads, not only that, you're in there laying eggs.
Doug Coupland

I think money is due for some sort of collapse. People are going to realize that money has a half-life, like radioactive elements.
Doug Coupland

I think that in the future, clocks won't say three o'clock anymore. They'll just get right to the point and rename three o'clock 'Pepsi.'
Doug Coupland

I think the killers get far too much attention.
Doug Coupland

I want pills called September 10. You take one and your mind feels like the 11th never happened.
Doug Coupland

I've got 911 on speed dial.
Doug Coupland

If a building looks better under construction than it does when finished, then it's a failure.
Doug Coupland

If cats were double the size they are now, they'd probably be illegal.
Doug Coupland

If God drives a car, He'd drive a 1973 Ford LTD Brougham sedan with a claret-colored vinyl roof, with oxblood leather upholstery and an opera window.
Doug Coupland

If human beings had genuine courage, they'd wear their costumes every day of the year, not just on Halloween.
Doug Coupland

If I think too much about all of those Chinese factories where all the stuff in a Wal-Mart is made, I get that woozy feeling you get when you see ducks covered in crude oil.
Doug Coupland

If nothing else, we simply get used to being alive.
Doug Coupland

If our subconscious was attractive, we wouldn't have to bury it down deep within us.
Doug Coupland

If someone decides to be a musician now, it means because there is no hope of money at the end of it, it means they really want to be a musician. And if someone is writing now, there is no hope for money at the end of it.
Doug Coupland

If you don't change, then what's the point of anything happening to you?
Doug Coupland

If you don't have a spiritual practice in place when times are good, you can't expect to suddenly develop one during a moment of crisis.
Doug Coupland

If you're not a tree hugger, then you're a what, a tree hater?
Doug Coupland

If your life had lyrics, would they be any good?
Doug Coupland

In our heads we're all about 33 years old.
Doug Coupland