Carol Burnett Quotes

Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.
Carol Burnett

Giving, Head, Taking

We don't stop going to school when we graduate.
Carol Burnett

Graduation, School, Stop

When you have a dream, you've got to grab it and never let go.
Carol Burnett

It's also selfish because it makes you feel good when you help others. I've been helped by acts of kindness from strangers. That's why we're here, after all, to help others.
Carol Burnett

Good, Selfish, Kindness

Because nobody goes through life without a scar.
Carol Burnett

Life, Through, Nobody

Comedy is tragedy plus time.
Carol Burnett

Time, Comedy, Tragedy

I wish my mother had left me something about how she felt growing up. I wish my grandmother had done the same. I wanted my girls to know me.
Carol Burnett

Mom, Mother, Done

Adolescence is just one big walking pimple.
Carol Burnett

Teen, Big, Walking

Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.
Carol Burnett

I'm glad I was born when I was. My time was the golden age of variety. If I were starting out again now, maybe things would happen for me, but it certainly would not be on a variety show with 28 musicians, 12 dancers, two major guest stars, 50 costumes a week by Bob Mackie. The networks just wouldn't spend the money today.
Carol Burnett

Age, Time, Money

I had a good loud voice and I wasn't afraid to be goofy or zany.
Carol Burnett

Good, Afraid, Voice

My interesting diet tips are eat early and don't nosh between meals. I mean, I can pack it away.
Carol Burnett

Diet, Mean, Away

I don't have false teeth. Do you think I'd buy teeth like these?
Carol Burnett

False, Teeth, Buy

Originally, I came from Texas, and we lived on - I guess you'd call it welfare, what we called relief.
Carol Burnett

Call, Texas, Lived

Words, once they are printed, have a life of their own.
Carol Burnett

Communication, Life, Words

You have to go through the falling down in order to learn to walk. It helps to know that you can survive it. That's an education in itself.
Carol Burnett

Education, Down, Through

But I don't begrudge anybody, because I know how hard it is to have that dream and to make it happen, whether or not it's just to put a roof over your head and food on the table.
Carol Burnett

Food, Hard, Happen

But I didn't ask to have somebody nose around in my private life. I didn't even ask to be famous. All I asked was to be able to earn a living making people laugh.
Carol Burnett

Life, Famous, Laugh

My grandmother and I followed my mother here, to a house a block north of Hollywood Boulevard but a million miles away from Hollywood, if you know what I mean. We would hang out behind the ropes and look at the movie stars arriving at the premieres.
Carol Burnett

Mother, Mean, Away

As far as sitcoms go, I thought Jenna Elfman in 'Dharma and Greg' was a wonderful physical comedienne who had great timing.
Carol Burnett

Great, Thought, Wonderful

Celebrity was a long time in coming; it will go away. Everything goes away.
Carol Burnett

Time, Long, Away

I can't tell a joke to save my soul. It's just not my thing, though I love to listen to jokes.
Carol Burnett

Love, Soul, Tell

I don't eat much meat, fish, or poultry.
Carol Burnett

Fish, Eat, Meat

I have a great memory.
Carol Burnett

I liked myself better when I wasn't me.
Carol Burnett

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Biography

Nationality: American

Born: April 26, 1933

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