Ambrose Bierce Quotes

In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.
Ambrose Bierce

Government, Republican, Office

Sabbath - a weekly festival having its origin in the fact that God made the world in six days and was arrested on the seventh.
Ambrose Bierce

God, Made, Fact

An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.
Ambrose Bierce

Person, Himself, Interested

Perseverance - a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
Ambrose Bierce

Success, Mediocrity, Virtue

Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art.
Ambrose Bierce

Art, Sun, Picture

Compromise, n. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction of thinking he has got what he ought not to have, and is deprived of nothing except what was justly his due.
Ambrose Bierce

Nothing, Thinking, Compromise

Jealous, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth keeping.
Ambrose Bierce

Jealousy, Jealous, Lost

Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.
Ambrose Bierce

Coward, Thinks, Legs

When you doubt, abstain.
Ambrose Bierce

Anoint, v.: To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery.
Ambrose Bierce

Great, King, Grease

Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.
Ambrose Bierce

Debt, Chain, Ingenious

Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
Ambrose Bierce

Nothing, Philosophy, Leading

Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
Ambrose Bierce

Machine, Pig, Litigation

What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
Ambrose Bierce

Country, Republican, Believes

Politeness, n: The most acceptable hypocrisy.
Ambrose Bierce

Hypocrisy, Politeness, Acceptable

Education, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.
Ambrose Bierce

Education, Wise, Foolish

Cynic, n: a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be.
Ambrose Bierce

Vision, Whose, Cynic

Egotism, n: Doing the New York Times crossword puzzle with a pen.
Ambrose Bierce

Times, York, Puzzle

Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.
Ambrose Bierce

Nature, Made, Body

Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.
Ambrose Bierce

Single, Universe, Ask

Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
Ambrose Bierce

Hope, Present, Eternity

Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
Ambrose Bierce

Power, Fool, Country

Alliance - in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other's pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.
Ambrose Bierce

Politics, Two, Cannot

Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
Ambrose Bierce

Patience, Virtue, Disguised

Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.
Ambrose Bierce

Religion, Nature, Hope

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Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Journalist

Born: June 24, 1842

Died: 1914

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Cite this Page: Citation

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