A high-brow is someone who looks at a sausage and thinks of Picasso.
A. P. Herbert

An Englishman never enjoys himself, except for a noble purpose.
A. P. Herbert

I am sure that the party system is right and necessary. there must be some scum.
A. P. Herbert

People must not do things for fun. We are not here for fun. There is no reference to fun in any Act of Parliament.
A. P. Herbert

The concept of two people living together for 25 years without a serious dispute suggests a lack of spirit only to be admired in sheep.
A. P. Herbert

The critical period of matrimony is breakfast-time.
A. P. Herbert

The Englishman never enjoys himself except for a noble purpose.
A. P. Herbert

This high official, all allow, is grossly overpaid; there wasn't any Board, and now there isn't any Trade.
A. P. Herbert